What is the Sick Buffalo Story in Thailand?
Published: September 21, 2021 - Reading time: 8 minutes
» Updated: January 18, 2025
Reading stories online about relationships in Thailand between Thai ladies and foreign men, you might occasionally hear the reference to a “sick buffalo”. The phrase has become an often repeated idiom by expats and men that are in relationships with Thai women.
The “sick buffalo story” in Thailand is an example of Thai ladies telling a story in order to generate sympathy from their foreign boyfriends and to try and get more money from them. Some ladies will tell their boyfriend that their family’s buffalo is sick and that they need money for veterinary bills. The “sick buffalo” story has been told in Thailand for decades.
Although the sick buffalo story is now somewhat of a joke, poverty in Thailand and across south east Asia is not a joke.
In Thai culture, the daughter of the family is traditionally responsible for supporting her parents in their old age. Your Thai girlfriend may be responsible for supporting her entire family as well as herself.
Often is the case that Thai ladies will have children with local Thai men at a young age, when their relationships break down, they are then expected to provide for their children as well as their parents. The concept of a child’s father giving money to his ex-partner as child support is relatively uncommon in Thailand.
As the minimum wage in Thailand is quite low, many women struggle to make ends meet, especially if they do not have steady careers or a university education. This can lead them to working in bars, and other adult entertainment venues in order to provide for their families.
Many of these ladies will go on to forge relationships with foreign men in nightlife venues; which is where they might tell the sick buffalo story in order to ask for extra money.
As many Thai ladies tend to hail from poor farming communities in north east Thailand, many of their families will earn money through farming pigs, cows or water buffalo, making the story that her family’s buffalo is sick plausible.
Many ladies might not claim that their family’s buffalo is sick, but instead that they urgently need money for medical bills or another emergency. While the story itself might not be truthful, the lady may or may not be in dire need of money for one reason or another.
Did You Know?
Under Thai law, if your Thai girlfriend is legally married, her husband could potentially sue you. To avoid such complications, we strongly recommend conducting a basic background check—or at least a marital status check—to verify her marriage and divorce history.
Our background check service can also help determine if your girlfriend is currently active on dating sites or if she appears in adult material. Taking these precautions can provide peace of mind and protect you from unexpected issues.
Is Her Buffalo Really Sick?
Is your girlfriend’s water buffalo really sick or is there a more likely reason? A more common reason for Thai ladies to need money is debt repayments.
If your girlfriend does come from a poor faming community and has a family to support, then it is very possible her true reason for requesting money from you is to repay debt, cover expenses related to farming, or to simply provide for her family.
In the wake of the coronavirus pandemic, household debt in Thailand ballooned to 90.5% of GDP in the first quarter of 2020, which is the highest level in 18 years according to Bank of Thailand data. Many will be dealing with the fallout of this debt for years to come.
Due to the concept of “saving face” in Thailand, and the general fear of causing upset, it is not likely that your Thai girlfriend will be totally open and honest with you about her financial situation.
Put simply, if your Thai girlfriend is struggling under a mountain of debt, then she might prefer to tell you that she needs money for her family’s sick buffalo instead. Of course, it is more common for ladies to claim that their mother or father is gravely sick in hospital and she needs money for the medical bills, or that she is having another emergency.
Although it’s easy to tell jokes about sick buffalos and Thai women telling lies to their foreign boyfriends in order to extract money from them, poverty is not a laughing matter, and the true reasons for women to tell these stories are often dire.
With all of the above said, you should not allow yourself to be taken for a ride whilst in a relationship with a Thai lady. While many Thai women are good and honest people, there is definitely a subset of women who try to take advantage of their foreign boyfriends, and practice what is known as the Thai girlfriend scam.
These ladies are often found in beer bars, a go-gos, massage parlours, and other nightlife areas where they interact with a high volume of foreign men.
In this current day and age, there is also a growing number of women that instead prefer to meet men through online dating websites and apps.
The “Thai girlfriend scam” typically involves an attractive Thai lady forming relationships with several different foreign men. These men will all believe that they are the only man in their girlfriend’s life, meanwhile she is speaking to multiple guys every day, often taking steps such as setting up multiple Facebook profiles for each of her boyfriends in order to make the scam more believable.
For some Thai women, especially those working in nightlife areas, relationships with foreign men pays their bills. Some ladies are able to earn vast amounts of money through scamming their boyfriends.
Determining whether a lady is genuine, or if she is simply telling stories about sick buffalos in order to extract as much money from you as possible, can be quite difficult. In such cases we are often asked by our clients to place a lady under surveillance in order to monitor her activities and check if she is meeting up with other men behind her boyfriend’s back.
If a lady is running a dating scam or involved with other men for financial gain, then conducting an investigation in this way can often help to save our clients huge amounts of money.
Is Your Thai Girlfriend Using You For Money?
There is a fine line between supporting your Thai girlfriend and helping her to better herself, and simply being taken for a ride. For more information on this subject, read our blog post 11 signs that your Thai girlfriend is using you for money.
Pattaya Private Investigators
We are a leading detective agency based in Pattaya, Thailand. Visit our homepage for more information about us, or feel free to get in touch with one of our experienced team members for a free quote.
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11 Signs Your Thai Girlfriend May Be Using You for Money
Published: September 19, 2021 - Reading time: 9 minutes
» Updated: January 11, 2025
In Thai culture, it is common for daughters to support their parents as they age. If you enter into a serious relationship with a Thai woman, a significant part of that responsibility may fall on your shoulders, extending beyond just her but also to her family.
If your partner does not have a stable income or a solid career, it is understandable that you may wish to provide her with financial support. However, there can come a time when some individuals may take advantage of their foreign partners. Based on our extensive experience as private investigators, we have compiled a list of the 11 key signs that your Thai girlfriend may be using you for monetary gain:
1. She Requests a Monthly Allowance
Many have encountered stories of Thai women receiving monthly allowances from their foreign partners. These allowances can range from 30,000 to 100,000 THB or even higher. If you are comfortable and financially capable of providing such support, that is your choice. However, if your girlfriend is demanding a substantial allowance, it raises questions about her intentions.
It's important to note that not all Thai women are responsible for supporting their families; affluent backgrounds may lessen these financial expectations. Yet, many women who date foreigners often come from less wealthy backgrounds, which may contribute to their requests for financial assistance.
As some might say, “If you are giving a monthly allowance, you might have more of an employer-employee relationship than a romantic one.” If your girlfriend insists on significant financial support, it may be worth questioning her genuine feelings towards you.
2. She Frequently Discusses Money
While discussions about finances are common, if your Thai girlfriend seems obsessed with money, discussing her friends’ wealth or their allowances excessively, it could signal a concerning focus on materialism rather than a genuine relationship.
3. She Shows No Interest in Marriage
Despite common misconceptions based on tourist hotspots, marriage holds significant cultural importance in Thailand. If you have been in a long-term relationship with your Thai partner and she exhibits no desire to marry, it may indicate a lack of commitment.
Marriage is a way to honour your relationship within her social circles, including her family and community. If she seems indifferent towards the idea of marriage, you might want to reconsider the dynamics of your relationship.
4. She Demands a Large Dowry/Sin Sod Payment
In Thai culture, a groom traditionally presents a dowry, known as “sin sod”, to his bride's family. This payment can range from 300,000 to over 1,000,000 THB, depending on the bride's background. If your girlfriend or her family expects a large sum, it might be prudent to question the motivations behind the relationship.
Remember, a dowry is intended as a gift, and once given, it is typically never returned. Be sure the relationship has a solid foundation before agreeing to any significant financial commitments.
5. She Drops Constant Hints for New Purchases
If your girlfriend frequently mentions needing new items—be it the latest phone, a new motorbike, or even household items—this could be an indication she is attempting to extract more money from you.
6. She Pressures You to Buy Her Gold
In Thailand, gold holds a different value compared to Western nations. With its high purity, Thai gold can be easily sold or pawned, making it a popular form of savings. While many Thai women appreciate gold jewellery, if your girlfriend insists on acquiring excessive amounts, it may raise suspicions about her motives.
7. She is Never Satisfied with Your Contributions
Is your girlfriend always asking for more, never content with what you offer? If she expects extravagant gifts rather than appreciating smaller gestures, it could suggest she is more focused on what you can provide financially than on the relationship itself.
8. She Avoids Introducing You to Friends and Family
A genuine relationship typically involves introductions to close friends and family. If your girlfriend is reluctant to introduce you, it might indicate that she is not serious about you, possibly because she has other interests or relationships.
9. There is No Emotional Connection
Emotional connection is crucial for a healthy, lasting relationship. If your girlfriend shows little interest in your feelings, dreams, or challenges, focusing instead on material matters, this could be a sign she is primarily interested in financial benefits.
10. She is Indifferent to Your Needs
If she shows no concern when you face difficulties or seeks emotional support, and only demands your attention when she needs something, it signals a lack of genuine investment in your relationship.
11. She Refers to You as a Customer
Some women in Thailand's tourist areas view foreign men more as customers than partners. If your girlfriend refers to you as her “customer” (the Thai word is “lukkha”), it might indicate she perceives the relationship as transactional rather than romantic.
Assessing Your Relationship with Your Thai Girlfriend
If you are dating a Thai woman from a less affluent background, it is reasonable to expect that some financial support may be necessary. However, if you are uncomfortable sharing your wealth, you might consider dating someone from a more financially stable background.
Moreover, if your girlfriend is significantly younger than you, there may be a higher likelihood that she is interested in the relationship for financial gain.
When supporting a Thai partner, consider how your contributions are spent. The saying “If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. If you teach a man to fish, you feed him for a lifetime” rings true. Instead of simply providing financial support, consider ways to empower her, such as helping her pursue education or start her own business.
Every individual is unique, and relationships vary significantly. Providing universally applicable advice on relationships with Thai women is a challenge.
Evaluate Your Concerns
If you suspect your Thai girlfriend is unfaithful or taking advantage of you financially, seeking professional assistance may provide clarity. We can perform a background check to check details surrounding your partner's lifestyle and history. Our services can often save clients far more than what they might spend on a partner's upkeep.
We offer free quotes for all our services. Feel free to contact one of our experienced team members for advice and assistance. For surveillance inquiries, we require details regarding your girlfriend's location and any relevant information about the situation. All interactions with us remain confidential.
Learn more about Pattaya Private Investigators.
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How Much Money Do Go-Go Dancers Earn In Thailand?
Published: September 15, 2021 - Reading time: 6 minutes
» Updated: October 15, 2024
Go-go dancers in Thailand are among the top earners in the nightlife industry. Their earnings often surpass those of women working in beer bars or massage parlours.
Depending on factors such as the dancer's popularity, the establishment where she works, and whether she has sponsors, Thai go-go dancers can earn between 40,000 – 100,000 THB per month. Some dancers may even exceed this, particularly if they have multiple foreign 'boyfriends' supporting them.
Breakdown of Go-go Dancer Earnings
Go-go dancers typically receive a base salary from the bar, in addition to earnings from customer-purchased drinks and bar fines. The income of each dancer can vary significantly, but here's an example of a typical breakdown:
Go-go dancer salary: 15,000 THB
80 lady drinks (at 80 THB): 6,400 THB
25 customers (at 2,500 THB): 62,500 THB
25 bar fines (at 1,000 THB): 25,000 THB
Grand total: 108,900 THB
Generally, the base salary represents a small fraction of the dancer’s total income. Salaries fluctuate, often based on the amount of clothing worn while dancing. Higher salaries are also offered when the bars face staffing shortages to attract dancers.
It’s important to remember that these figures are only rough estimates as earnings can vary due to numerous factors.
Lady Drinks for Thai Go-go Dancers
Go-go dancers earn a commission whenever a drink is purchased for them, commonly referred to as 'lady drinks'. These drinks are often more expensive than standard drinks, with a typical price of 350 THB, of which the dancer might earn a 50—100 THB commission.
The commission per drink can vary from 50 to 100 THB, or more if a customer buys an expensive bottle of liquor to share with the dancer. Dancers often collect slips for each drink purchased and redeem them for their commission at the end of the night.
These commissions can accumulate quickly, with popular dancers receiving as many as 30-50 drinks in one night. Dancers frequently collaborate with each other to maximise their earnings, encouraging customers to buy drinks for their friends as well.
Are lady drinks alcoholic?
One common misconception is that all lady drinks are alcoholic. While this is sometimes the case, if a 40KG (90 pound) go-go dancer has 45 drinks bought for her in one night, then you can bet that not every one was alcoholic, unless she ended up in hospital as a result. Bar girls often drink non-alcoholic fruit juice or mixers when they feel that they've had enough.
Freelance Go-go Dancers
Some go-go bars employ freelance dancers who don’t receive a fixed salary but may get a small nightly retainer. Freelancers prefer this arrangement as it grants them more freedom to work at multiple bars or spend longer periods with particular customers.
Rules regarding lady drinks and bar fines may also differ for freelancers, depending on the bar.
How Many Customers Do Go-go Dancers Have?
The number of customers a go-go dancer has depends on her popularity and where she works. Top-earning dancers may have up to two short-time sessions per day during peak season, with each session lasting as little as 30 minutes.
Meanwhile, older or less attractive dancers might struggle to find even one customer per day.
Sponsoring a Thai Go-go Dancer
Sponsors provide a significant source of income for many go-go dancers. It’s not uncommon for men to fall in love with a dancer after spending time with her at the bar, despite the potential pitfalls.
Once a dancer secures a sponsor, she will often continue working at the go-go bar, reassuring her sponsor that she no longer engages with customers. In reality, many dancers continue to work as usual but lie to their sponsors about their activities.
Some dancers even convince their sponsors that they have quit the bar scene entirely. They send photos of themselves in the countryside or doing legitimate work, but behind the scenes, they continue working in the bars. Many sponsors are deceived, believing they are the only man in the dancer's life, while the dancer maintains several sponsors to maximise her income.
In a Relationship with a Thai Go-go Dancer
If you’re in a relationship with a Thai go-go dancer and sending her money under the assumption that she’s loyal, you might want to consider investigating her activities. Checking up on her can help protect your investment and give you peace of mind.
Our investigations into go-go dancers often save clients far more money than they would spend supporting a dancer for a short period, not to mention the emotional toll that can be avoided by learning the truth sooner rather than later.
Learn more about bar girl investigations.
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15 Common Lies Thai Bar Girls Tell Foreigners
Published: September 14, 2021 - Reading time: 9 minutes
» Updated: October 19, 2024
Thai bar girls know precisely what to say to present themselves as appealing to customers and to portray themselves in the best possible light. This article explores some of the most prevalent lies told by Thai bar girls to foreigners.
1. “It’s my first week in the bar”
This is one of the most common fabrications that bar girls in Thailand tell foreigners. Whether she claims it’s her first day, week, or month working in the bar, you can bet that these statements are often untrue.
A clear indication of this lie is if the lady speaks decent English but has never attended university; she has likely honed her language skills through her time working in the bar, far exceeding just one week!
2. Lying about their age
Many Thai women possess an extraordinary ability to appear much younger than their actual age, and professionally applied makeup can significantly enhance this effect.
Thai bar girls are acutely aware that most men favour younger women, and it’s not unusual for them to claim they are 10 or 15 years younger to boost their appeal to customers.
3. Lying about having children
Most ladies work in bars to support their families. Child support is relatively uncommon in Thailand, so many women resort to working in red-light areas to provide for their loved ones.
Having children is often perceived as a disadvantage in attracting customers. As a result, bar girls frequently lie about not having children or claim to have only one when they actually have two or three. By the time the man discovers the truth, he may be so enamoured and committed that it no longer matters.
4. Lying about their name
Bar girls rarely use their real names. Instead, they might tell you their name is “Pin”, “Apple”, or “Pea”, but disclosing their actual name is quite rare.
The use of nicknames is commonplace in Thailand for various reasons. Bar girls understand that most foreigners struggle to pronounce their real names and prefer to choose names that are easier for non-Thai speakers to grasp.
5. “I have never gone with a customer before”
A bar girl’s job is to leave the bar with customers as often as possible; that’s how they earn their money. If a lady claims she has never left the bar with a customer, don’t believe her. She may be setting you up for a long-distance relationship (a bar girl scam), suggesting that she is “different” or “not like the other girls” to increase her appeal by claiming she is not “high mileage”. This is a common lie among bar girls.
Most bar girls investigated by us are found to be unfaithful to their partners. If you find yourself in a relationship with a Thai bar girl, then we can assist you in verifying her fidelity while you are away.
Learn more about bar girl investigations.
6. “I don’t have a boyfriend!”
Many bar girls indeed have boyfriends—whether it’s a local Thai man who accepts their profession or a foreigner who met her while she was working in the bar.
Bar girls will never admit to having a boyfriend. For many, the goal is to establish multiple foreign relationships, with each man believing he is the only one in her life. This can be quite lucrative for some bar girls.
7. She doesn’t like dating Thai men
Most bar girls will claim they don’t find Thai men attractive, stating they are poorly treated by them. This lie often aims to deflect suspicion of having a local boyfriend or husband, making the bar girl seem more appealing to customers.
8. She feels sick after leaving the bar
After you have paid a bar fine and left with the lady, she might suddenly claim to feel unwell, perhaps developing a headache or an upset stomach.
The motivation behind this lie is straightforward: the lady may prefer a quiet evening watching television or resting rather than engaging in the activities you might have anticipated.
9. “I don’t like young guys; I only like old men”
This lie is typically only expressed if you are of a more advanced age. Some bar girls claim they are only attracted to older men, presumably to make you feel comfortable and understand why they are particularly keen on you.
While some bar girls may genuinely prefer older customers, it’s not for the reasons they might suggest. Younger men can be more demanding and frugal, while older men often have more cash and are more likely to tip.
10. “I want to go to massage school”
If you’re spending time with a bar girl, she may express a desire to attend massage school or open a salon. These are subtle hints that, if you enter a serious relationship, she is willing to leave bar work behind for a legitimate job.
Some ladies will pursue massage training, open a salon, or establish a small business in their village if given the opportunity; however, others may take the money and continue working in bars. Typically, you won’t discover her true intentions until you’ve begun financing her new venture and parted with your cash.
11. She does not answer your calls
When attempting to contact a Thai bar girl, you may find that she doesn’t answer your calls. The phone goes to voicemail repeatedly, and your messages remain unread. After a few hours, she may call back, claiming “Sorry, my phone didn’t have any battery” or a similar excuse.
In reality, she was likely spending time with another customer or her boyfriend. You may have suspicions, but disproving her claims can be quite difficult.
12. “I was late because of bad traffic”
If a lady is with one client and the session takes longer than expected, a common excuse is to claim she was delayed due to bad traffic. This is a classic and easy excuse to use when arriving late for a meeting.
Bear in mind that a ‘short time’ session might last only 30 minutes or less. If a lady is late for this amount of time, it might be because she has just serviced another client before reaching you. Using traffic as an excuse is an easy way to explain this scenario.
13. “He is only a friend”
If you peruse a bar girl’s social media profile or her phone’s camera roll, you’re likely to encounter photos of her with other customers.
Of course, she will insist that “he is only a friend.” Another common lie is to claim the man she was with is gay. The motivation for this deception is straightforward; she wants to appear single, perhaps hoping you will seek to fill that void and develop a romantic relationship.
14. “You are a handsome man”
No matter your appearance—you could be 85 years old and 100 kilograms overweight—a bar girl will still label you as a “handsome man”. She is simply trying to stroke your ego in hopes you will take a liking to her.
The “handsome man” phrase has become a running joke among visitors and expats in Pattaya, where every man is deemed handsome as he wanders the streets of Thailand.
15. “You have a good heart; I like you”
This line is another tactic to flatter clients; many bar girls will express sentiments like “You have a good heart, I like you; you are not like other guys.” Such compliments can help bar girls forge a ‘connection’ with their clients, making them believe the lady has deep feelings for them.
In most cases, the bar girl hopes her client will choose to spend more time with her rather than with other women, or she might be setting the stage for a long-term relationship. Both outcomes will typically yield her more money than a simple one-night encounter.
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