Ladies that work at bars in Thailand are far from stupid, many of them are very intelligent. Bar girls understand that if they find the right man while working in a bar, they could get married and set themselves up for life. Many men that visit bars in Thailand end up falling in love with bar girls and fall victim to the ‘bar girl scam’.
Most bar girls will know a friend that has met their wealthy foreign husband through working in a bar, and many are looking for a boyfriend/husband to support them.
After you have visited bars in Thailand a few times, you will start to realize that bar girls tend to ask a specific set of questions. On the face of it these questions can seem like petty small talk, in fact sometimes it might be just that, however, they are usually probing for information which can help them to understand the customer and gauge his net worth.
We have put together the following list of questions that Thai bar girls ask foreigners to analyse these questions and delve into the information which can be gathered from them.
Probably the first questions that you will be asked in a bar, besides what you would like to drink, will be the questions “What your name?” or “You how old?”. This is a general ice breaker and asking for your name allows the lady to introduce herself and open dialog for further conversation.
This question is very important and will greatly influence how the bar girl views the man she is speaking to. If the customer responds by saying that he has visited Thailand 10 times, she will recognize that this guy knows the score… He will probably have spoken to many different bar girls before, possibly forged relationships with them, and will be somewhat versed on the type of scams that bar girls are known to perpetrate.
If the guy responds by saying that he’s on his first trip to Thailand, this will be music to her ears. Men that have never experienced the Thai nightlife scene tend to be more ‘believing’ of things they are told by bar girls, and more susceptible to scams in general.
TIP: If you are visiting Thailand for the first time, it’s best to keep that information to yourself when speaking to bar girls. Don't tell bar girls that you are visiting for the first time. Instead, claim that you have visited several times already.
This is another very common question that bar girls ask customers. And while it might seem innocuous, a lot can be learned about a potential client by the hotel he is staying at. If you respond by saying that you are staying in a hostel, or a cheap budget friendly hotel, this will signal to her that you don’t have much money to spend.
If you respond by saying that you are staying at The Hilton, or another five star/luxury hotel, this is a pretty good indication that you have money. The lady might show more interest in you if she perceives that you have money and are willing to spend it.
“Where do you work?” or “What you work?” as spoken in broken English, is another great way for the lady to size up the man’s net worth and his social status. If he responds by saying that he works cleaning public toilets and has saved up for years to holiday in Thailand, then his appeal as a long term ‘boyfriend’ is probably going to drop.
On the other hand, if the customer claims that he is a CEO or a white collar professional, this is going to help the lady realize that she is dealing with a man with a good-sized disposable income, which is exactly what she wants to hear.
Native English speakers can easily figure out where another English speaker comes from, just by hearing their voice. Most of us will be able to distinguish between a British voice and an American voice, or an Australian voice and a south African voice, for example.
Many Thai ladies struggle to recognize accents and most of the time will need to ask where you come from in order to figure this out.
And make no mistake about it, bar girls have their own stereotypes about different nationalities, which will be based on their own experiences and stories from their friends. Speaking in general terms, most bar girls tend to favour guys from Western countries such as the US, UK, Europe, or Australia.
“How long is your holiday?” is another good question which can help a lady to build a picture about their customer. If a guy is only in town for 7 days, then he might be staying with a lower overall budget, and her timeframe to form a relationship with him will be more limited.
If the man responds by saying that he is staying for 3 or 4 weeks on the other hand, this shows that he can afford a longer trip and has the freedom to stay in Thailand for a longer time. If a guy is more likely to be a repeat customer, then she might form the opinion that he is more deserving of her attention.
Again, this question seems innocent enough, but it can help the lady to build a picture about a man’s lifestyle and his income.
Not everyone that has wealth will display it by driving around in an expensive vehicle. The type of man that doesn’t might be described as a “cheap Charlie”. Bar girls are looking for men with money that are not afraid to spend it.
As “saving face” is a big part of Thai culture, most Thais will drive expensive vehicles if they can afford it and are given the opportunity, in order to increase how they are perceived by others. Driving an old or cheap vehicle will be a turnoff for many bar girls.
Sometimes bar girls will be very direct and ask whether their customer wants a Thai girlfriend. They might ask this question jokingly, but if the answer is “yes”, then this can act as a green light for further advances, if she has deemed that he is worthy of her attention.
Finding your girlfriend in a Thai bar is never a good idea. Bar girls are always on the lookout for sponsors and men that will help to send them money whilst they continue to work in the bar and sleep with new clients.
Many bar girls also practice what we describe as ‘bar girl scams’, which can prove extremely lucrative for them and heart breaking for the victims.
The above questions are typical small talk that you will probably find when drinking in Thai bars. Bar girls will usually ask these questions hundreds of times per month to different clients.
The answer to these questions will help a lady to form an opinion about the man she is speaking to, specifically how much money he has and how suitable he is for her.
If your girlfriend works in a bar in Thailand, then you are in trouble. Most of the bar girls we investigate are found to be cheating on their boyfriends while they are out of the country.
Instead of blindly wiring money to a Thai bar girl, you can instruct us to check on her activities and discover the truth. Bar girl investigations typically save our clients far more money than we charge in professional fees.
Learn more about bar girl investigations.